Monday, February 13, 2012

~ Betty Crocker....

... I am NOT!!!
But I try.   And try.
I decided to "try" to make some cookies
while my husband was napping.
I thought "Heck, he likes cookies....
...I'll make cookies."
So, off to the kitchen I go.
Ah! Yes!
Cookie mix (not from scratch
but "à la Betty Crocker".....
....looks something like this....
"The Mix"

Next I'm thinking I should add some flavoring ...
...hhhhmmmmm....
maybe I'll make a few different batches
and just add some extract for flavor...
I pat myself on the back.
....looks something like this.....
"The Flavors"
I'll do a little vanilla....
a little almond....
a little peppermint....
a little orange....
and for sure a little Amaretto.
My ♥ for Amaretto is a whole other blog!!!!
Anyway, those are the flavors I chose for my cookies.
Yah!!!!
I get my cookie mix and my egg and my butter
(actually, I used margarine).
I get my ingredients in the mixing bowl and use my hands to mix it all up.
"Hey", I think out loud, "this isn't so bad."
I'm smiling and mixing.
And mixing.
And smiling.
And mixing.
What.The.Heck????
I've got a gooey mess going on....
....looks something like this....
"The Mess"
It's stickin' all over the place ....
I.Can't.Get.It.Off.My.Hands.
I'm tugging.
I'm pulling.
I'm waving my hands over the sink.
I'm adding flour and more flour.
I'm beginning to panic.
I plop the goo down on the counter figuring I'd roll it out.
Not.A.Good.Idea.
I don't own a rolling pin
so
I used a bottle of wine.
Cookie dough stuck to that vintage in no time.
Dang!
Now I've got a gooey bottle of wine in my gooey hands.
I scrape up the dough and plop it back in the bowl.
I stare at it
for what seems like forever.
I'm also staring at the bottle of wine.
I shake it off .... bits of cookie dough flying off me.
I mix the dough up some more ...
add more flour ...
and decide that I'm done.
Let's get this on a cookie sheet before my husband wakes up.
Now, be forewarned ....
if you have a quesy stomach I advise you to look away.
.....looks something like this.....
"The Cookies"
Well, they're not totally horrible ...
but they are so not what I was hoping for.
Anyway, my husband gets up from his nap and
finds his way to the kitchen ....
sniffing ....
proclaiming "I smell cookies!"
I had to remind him
that
I am NOT Betty Crocker ...
....looks something like this....
"Not Betty Crocker"

~THE END~
P.S.  I won't let this discourage me....
I will bake again!!!!

12 comments:

  1. Lolol! That is too funny!!!

    And I'd eat them for sure ;)

    ReplyDelete
  2. hahaha! I really thought the picture with the flavoring was a 'what doesn't belong' - but clearly, your cookies have a little more kick than mine. I love the stages of your pictures and your expression - too cute!

    ReplyDelete
  3. OMG lmfao. I totally rock sis!!! Holy hell I can't stop laughing. That shot of you at the end is priceless!!!! Gorgeous photos to boot. I just love u!!!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Great shots D. Love the SP at the end

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hey, we all have our "flops" (in our own minds, I think.) I bet these were great -- at least you tried. Keep trying -- it will get better. Love your last photo -- cute!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Haha...love the selfie! Too f unny!

    Kathy

    ReplyDelete
  7. That is to funny.. I just love how you used a bottle of wine as a rolling pin! I think your cookies look good. But your selfie shot at the end is priceless... I love it!!

    ReplyDelete
  8. I love the flour all over your face! I'm not really a baker either, I'm just lucky that my children eat anything.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Ha! You are hilarious! I definitely can relate, but you are much more courageous than me!

    ReplyDelete
  10. You had me at Amaretto! :) You are so silly Diane, and I just love your commentary.. LOL

    ReplyDelete
  11. LOL, I've been there, believe me. Did they taste good though? :)

    ReplyDelete
  12. Hahaha, I love this! I'm always making a mess in the kitchen when I bake!

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for stopping by! Leave a comment .... let's chat!